Photo: hkalkan/Shutterstock

35 Things You’ll Never Hear Someone From San Francisco Say

San Francisco
by Turner Wright Jun 24, 2016

1. “Move aside. The Google bus is approaching, and we must bow our heads to respect our benevolent overlords.”

2. “No, I don’t think there’s anything going on this weekend.”

3. “Hang on, let me just give this guy by the BART machine some change; I hate to see someone lose their ticket day after day.”

4. “I love these warm summer nights.”

5. “Let’s meet in Fisherman’s Wharf!”

6. “There was no problem finding parking.”

7. “I don’t think there is a gluten-free option.”

8. “There aren’t any start-ups in this area.”

9. “Is there a non-organic option?”

10. “I’m just moving to the East Bay. I’m sure we can still hang out.”

11. “I won’t have a pot smoker as a roommate.”

12. “T-shirt and shorts should be fine. It’ll stay warm.”

13. “Just park in front of that driveway.”

14. “Don’t worry about an Uber; I’ll just walk through the Tenderloin.”

15. “Taking the cable car is easier.”

16. “Really? Can’t they just tone it down on Pride Week?”

17. “They don’t have an app for that.”

18. “You should see my new place! The rent is great, and it’s huge!”

19. “Those cyclists aren’t pretentious at all.”

20. “I’m not sure how you open the back door of the bus.”

21. “I’m so sick of the lack of decent restaurants in the city.”

22. “No, I haven’t seen a crazy or naked person in quite some time.”

23. “Dolores Park is overrated.”

24. “Let’s just take Lombard. It’ll be faster.”

25. “Dogs definitely aren’t allowed here.”

26. “Let’s go hunting this week!”

27. “Yeah, right, like this city has any decent beer.”

28. “I really feel like a swim. Want to hit the beach?”

29. “So what if the Giants won the pennant?”

30. “I don’t see why we should go all the way to Napa just for a little wine.”

31. “I love the music people blast on the bus.”

32. “Feels like a good day to hit up Alcatraz.”

33. “To be honest, this city was my second choice. LA was the first.”

34. “Wow, you’re right on time!”

35. “You know, those guys with the big signs by Powell make some pretty valid points.”

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