Comments on: Family vs. travel: Regretting the road not taken

By: Weifarer

Weifarer — Mon, 04 Oct 2010 00:42:23 +0000

I just want to say thanks for the article and the comments it spawned as well. It is really encouraging to see a community open to children, or not, and supporting just the spirited adventure that life should be.

I agree with so many of the comments here, especially as a 36 year old woman, married for 8 years but with no children (by choice – one that I made permanent a year ago). The questions I STILL get from family on coworkers who assume I’m simply waiting for the lucky moment astonish me. Why is it so difficult to realize in this day and age that there are a multitude of choices? I’m happy for my friends and relatives with kids. It just isn’t for me or my husband.

Congrats on the marriage and the continuing journeys. I think there will always be questions about choices, but if you are happy with where you are now than you are doing okay. If you aren’t happy, chose something different!

By: melissa

melissa — Wed, 15 Sep 2010 17:47:18 +0000

The issue here doesn’t seem to be ‘to travel or not to travel..’ sounds more like we should recognize what we have, chosen or not, and be satisfied. It’s always difficult to let go of ‘shoulda, coulda, wouldas’ and stay present.

I’m traveling, I think about how lovely home is.
I’m home, I think about how lovely traveling is.

Vicious cycle, but noticing it has me thinking… aren’t they both lovely? Aren’t all options what we make of them? Is it possible for us to simply follow our hearts and do what feels right without regret?

Thanks for this article, got my gears turning.

By: jp

jp — Sat, 14 Aug 2010 18:50:07 +0000

while children are wonderful and adorable and the blog is not soley this topic…there are many, many children being born, the world is over crowded are resources are threatened and the sun is getting hotter. this is fact.

if the call to parenting is yours then take it and be blessed and work and hope for the best. if not, rejoice in your freedom and ability to travel, create, change careers, study and endless other options available. around the world are orphanages filled with parentless children.

whatever the decision, be grateful as life is a gift and in gratitude are the greatest blessings.

By: soultravelers3

soultravelers3 — Sat, 19 Jun 2010 12:47:14 +0000

I understand these thoughts! I’ve done LOTS of travel in my life as a single and as a couple. Even as I child, I knew I wanted to wait until the last possible minute to have a child, even if that meant not having one as things DO change when one takes on that awesome responsibility if you take it seriously ( which I think is important for our children and this planet).

But I did have my one and only child late in life and traveling the world with her and my soulmate husband has been the best experience in our lives. ( We have been traveling the world non-stop since 2006, living large on just 23 dollars a day per person).

The great thing about today’s 4HWW life, is one CAN have it all. Almost anyone can travel the world to their hearts content with or without a family. Slow travel is actually cheaper than living at home and most can work and school any where today if one is willing to live a greener, simpler, freer life and enjoy the greatest wealth in life….time and love.

By: Katrina

Katrina — Thu, 27 May 2010 15:05:24 +0000

I am 19 and I absolutely love travel! Any type of travel – whether it be venturing to far off countries or a weekend road trip, the thrill of seeing new places and meeting new people will never disappear. I have been blessed with coming from an adventurous family and fell in love with travel from a young age. However, the one thing for me that is more important than travel, is having children. I can’t think of anything more magical than creating life! I would give up any type of expedition in my life if it meant I was able to have kids.

By: Gurpreet

Gurpreet — Wed, 19 May 2010 15:51:41 +0000

Interesting, thoughtful article. Thanks for sharing.

By: Scott

Scott — Mon, 17 May 2010 16:59:24 +0000

As my brother Dan said to me – he, holding his newborn third child; me, just a month returned from my fifth multi-month journey to India . . . “The grass is green on both sides of the fence.” Amen.

By: Sean

Sean — Wed, 28 Apr 2010 14:49:34 +0000

I am an American married to a woman from Thailand. We have one son (we only want one) who really is the light of our lives. Travel is extremely important to us. After marriage and before our son, we lived for a year abroad in Japan and I must say it was probably the best year of our marriage. We keep thinking about how to get abroad again…It is really hard sometimes to get back that which you let go of so easily…:) Right now it is not so much our child that holds us back, but much more several mortgages on properties bought during the real estate “boom”… These properties were supposed to give us an edge to early retirement and more extensive travel and now we work for them…haha No pity party though, all is ok, we own our own business, do ok, and usually spend about 8 – 10 weeks in Thailand each year. Everything is choice. Everything. And don’t even worry about not having children. The fact that you really considered it and know yourselves is more than most people who just have children without thought…Sorry for the rambling message…

By: Big Adventure

Big Adventure — Mon, 26 Apr 2010 23:24:06 +0000

Thank you for this article. It touches a topic that I’ve been confronted with quite a bit. I’ve spent my life traveling and it is what I’ve wanted since childhood. Some people cannot imagine that one would not want children and pressure others to have children, as if it were our social duty. I am middle aged, don’t want children and never have. But I am pressured by some people who have children to follow suit! It is not as though human beings were in short supply; we are adding approximately one billion new ones a decade on an increasingly steep curve, destroying nature in the process. It can be argued, in view of population statistics, that it is a more selfless decision toward society not to have children. Some people with children argue that their children will pay our social security later; well, it’s the least they can do, in view of the fact that the rest of us shoulder the burden of their tax breaks and school costs during our entire working life.

By: shakester

shakester — Thu, 29 Oct 2009 09:20:04 +0000

Good read, enjoyed the comments as much.
@ carlo : My biggest pet peeve in the world” “Oh, it’s good to do it now while you’re young/before you settle down/before you have kids”.
So true. That, and “Why don’t you just have kids (and) get it out of the way/get it done”. Er, what???

@ Cathey : ” have no plans to visit Disneyland anytime soon.”
ha, love the line, and all it implies/says.