1. The quarterback of the Denver Broncos.
I’m not sure I had ever heard a positive comment about Peyton Manning before he signed with the Broncos, but overnight it was like he became the prodigal son of John Elway. The Colt grew up, became a Bronco, and He could do no wrong. When he slumped, the cries for Brock Osweiler started. When Osweiler went in, he was king for a few days, but now that he’s gone the city laughs louder at the mere mention of his name than they do while watching Tebow play left field. To be the quarterback of the Broncos is to be the subject of constant scrutiny, embellished praise, and ultimate celebrity in the Mile High City.
2. Stand-up paddleboarding.
I’ll admit, I want to try it. I never have. I’ll also admit, I think it looks absolutely ridiculous, but it seems like every day another friend posts a photo of themselves paddling across a still lake or up a slow moving river. There must be something to it.
3. Electing Democratic Mayors.
We haven’t elected a Republican mayor in over fifty years, and with the constant influx of progressive millennials coming into the city, it doesn’t look like it will happen anytime soon.
4. Rooftop patios.
For proof of Denver’s obsession with drinking on top of buildings, look no further than our Major League Baseball stadium – the only one in the league with a ‘rooftop patio,’ which seems to draw as many people as the team itself. Across town, even indoor music venues are plotting to put in a rooftop drinking area to catch a piece of the action.
If you’ve ever driven on a road in Denver, or anywhere else in Colorado for that matter, you know. We have a love affair with our Subies so strong that not even the luscious curves of a sleek Toyota can tempt us away.
6. Shortening neighborhood names to 4-5 letters, typically ending in a vowel.
LoHi, RiNo, Lodo, and on and on. Even the exceptions stay true to most of the form, Wash Park, they’ve just doubled the letter pleasure.
7. And then talking about the city’s neighborhoods, constantly.
Starting with a top 3 list of neighborhoods we’re interested in living in, besides where we’re already located, as soon as there’s a dip in rent prices. This analysis is complete with an in-depth breakdown of the pros and cons of each neighborhood, a rundown of breweries bike-able from the area, and a thorough discussion of traffic patterns on the main thoroughfares.
8. Speaking of biking…
Denverites spend a lot of time on two wheels. The city just implemented an amazing new system of bike lanes through downtown, and it’s common to see bikers lining lanes everywhere from big streets to neighborhood roads to park and rec areas. We’re even getting to the point where there are more bikers than heroin needles on the Cherry Creek Trail.
9. Supporting local bands.
Or at least trying to. The city takes much pride in our ability to break artists on a national level (Nathaniel Rateliff, Flobots, Tennis, the list goes on), and local press is constantly abuzz about which group is next. But through all of the hype, there’s an awful lot of self-centered nonsense, pandering, and ‘what can I get out of this’ attitude going on. A new venue opens up every few months, but they’re shutting down just as frequently. It’s a vicious cycle.
10. Doing any activity outdoors.
Cooking, sleeping, walking, reading, it doesn’t really matter. If it can be done outside, the people of Denver prefer to do it there. It must be the lingering feeling of accomplishment from the most recent ski day or backpacking trip.