12 Commandments for Dating a Las Vegas Girl

1. Thou shalt not admit to going to strip clubs.

Okay, you’re a man and you live in a city with some of the best strip clubs in the world. Of course you’ve been. Just keep it to yourself.

2. Thou shalt not call a girl your “good luck charm” at the blackjack table.

What am I, at work right now?

3. Thou shalt not mention the Treasure Island Sirens.

If you know anything about Vegas, you know that the best Treasure Island show was a real, gritty, pirate battle from the good ‘ol days — not the new Britney Spears-inspired spectacle it has become. A preference for the new show distinguishes the locals from the tourists.

4. Thou shalt keep your eyes off the cocktail waitresses.

Scantily-clad waitresses are unavoidable in this city. Keep your eyes on your date!

5. Thou shalt not go clubbing outside of work.

In a city crawling with perhaps the highest number of tourists, specifically seeking one-night stands, in the country at any given time, do not admit to hanging in these unsavory crowds. In fact, spending time on the Strip outside of work should never be admitted to period.

6. Thou shalt be superiorly creative for dates.

There are a ridiculous amount of dating activity options here, so don’t bore her with dinner and a movie. Prove that you’re not a tourist and know the best the city has to offer. Consider Mt Charleston, Lake Mead or Red Rock Canyon for outdoorsy adventure, roller coasters at New York New York or the Stratosphere, or a late night Cirque show, followed by tapas at one of the hundreds of gorgeous restaurants and wine bars throughout the city.

7. Thou shalt not speak poorly of entertainers.

Entertainers built this city, and it’s a sure bet your date at least knows someone who works in the Industry, so be careful before you speak.

8. Thou shalt not be capable of getting lost in the city.

Visible from nearly all points of the city, the Strip is your compass — Stratosphere is north, Mandalay Bay is south. It’s simple.

9. Thou shalt not complain about the heat.

“It’s a dry heat” is a phrase to live by in Vegas. In other words, it’s no big deal. Sweating is for out-of-towners.

10. Thou shalt know cocktail vernacular.

Never hesitate over what to get at a bar. Order a cocktail like James Bond.

11. Thou shalt avoid buffets for dates.

It’s just not sexy.

12. Thou shalt not end a date before 10 p.m.

This is when most people start getting ready to go out here. What are you thinking?