Photo: Tavis Ford

1. You’re genuinely concerned about Roller Skate Girl’s safety.

2. You have definite opinions on the Megabite vs. Uncle Fatih’s debate.

3. You wanted a car for your Z95.3 bumper sticker.

4. You had a very severe condition that flared up on sunny afternoons and could only be cured at wreck.

5. You have a favourite craft brewpub in every neighbourhood but spend most of your nights sighing at your bank account while swilling Cariboo.

6. You loved the aquarium, space centre, and Science World, but you knew that the mac daddy of all field trips was Splashdown.

7. You know what happens in Whistler doesn’t stay in Whistler, though you really wish it did.

8. You never developed an inner compass and get lost now in any city without mountains and an ocean.

9. Your parents never took you to Capilano because Lynn Canyon was free.

10. You spoil the atmosphere of movies by identifying where things really are… I’m looking at you, BCIT aerospace campus.

11. You’re 25 years old and still hang out with your high school friend group.

12. You know the difference between Playland and the PNE.

13. You’re busy every Pirate Pack Day for the rest of your life.

14. You know you won’t be doing anything tomorrow if you start at the Cambie and/or finish at the Roxy.

15. You’ve accepted that you’ll probably never own a house.

16. You’re okay with the Canucks, but at the time of writing this they’re losing so you’re not currently a fan.

17. You know only the classiest musicians play at the Orpheum or Queenie.

18. You think an umbrella is a perfectly awesome Christmas or birthday present.

19. You wish you had a penny for every time a high school teacher said UBC or SFU.

20. You know that more than 3cm of snow means a total city shutdown.

21. You’re tempted to bring a survival kit on the Skytrain because who knows how long you’ll be between stations.

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