1. You know you need approximately 10,000 pieces of ID to buy two beers maximum at GM Place.

2. The water bottle you took on the Skytrain contains 0% water.

3. Your liver hasn’t been the same since the extended bar hour blitz of 2010, or as some called it: “The Olympics.”

4. You line up for Old Jalopy.

5. You know your closest BCL and private, their hours, and cost comparisons.

6. You went to your first happy hour in your 20s.

7. You’re all too enthusiastic to buy an out-of-towner a welcome rocky mountain bear fucker.

8. You get extra defensive about your position on PBR, Lucky Lager, Hell’s Gate, and Cariboo.

9. You know that camping is really just a socially acceptable way of saying “woods drinking.”

10. You smugly celebrate the start of patio season three weeks before the rest of the country.

11. You made a pilgrimage to Alberta when you were 18. Sorry Calgary.

12. You know which bars have board games but you never play them.

13. You know the night got away from you when you suddenly realize you’re in Roosters. (How did I get to Pitt Meadows? How am I getting home? Is that an upside down margarita?!)

14. You’ve achieved a critical hit and earned a beerbarian button at the Storm Crow.

15. You know you can’t judge people’s appearance at Bon’s on Saturday and Sunday mornings.

16. You’ve given up on drinking during fireworks.

17. You have a healthy fear of Mirage, The Dew and Status.

18. You wish you were rich enough to drink at Pourhouse all the time.

19. You’ve had sake bombs at The Eatery.

20. You know at least two people who only drink IPAs because they want to appear to be in the craft-beer know.

21. You miss the popsicles at wreck, dammit.

22. You didn’t do any of the above things until you were 19. Totally.

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