The 10 Commandments of Living in Philly

2. Thou shalt never go to Pat’s or Geno’s.

If you do, you’re a tourist.

3. Thou shall keep thy head on a swivel in Wawa’s parking lot.

The only place in the world where someone will hold the door for you when you go in but run you over in the parking lot!

4. Thou shall not follow non-Philly teams.

We live and breathe for our sports teams.

5. Thou shall not take a parking spot another Philadelphian has shoveled.

I don’t care if there is no “savesies”. I will flatten your tires. It’s about respect.

6. Thou shalt never badmouth Rocky.

Real or not, we love him.

7. Thou shall expect lots of traffic delays and accidents on the Schuylkill Expressway.

We don’t call it the “Surekill” for nothing!

8. Thou shalt never expect a break from the PPA.

The meter ran out 1 minute ago? Here’s a ticket. Your car won’t start? Here’s a ticket. You thought you could run in the store for 3 minutes without putting money in the meter? TICKET!

9. Thou shall expect to pay egregious taxes on everything.

Enough said.

10. Thou shall not call jimmies “sprinkles”!

They’re jimmies. End of discussion.