What they say: I’m going to the doctor.
What they mean: I’m going to the weed doctor.

What they say: I’m from L.A.
What they mean: I’m from San Fernando Valley.

What they say: I can’t eat gluten.
What they mean: I choose not to eat gluten.

What they say: I’m allergic to dairy.
What they mean: Almond milk seems cool right now, let’s go with that.

What they say: It was a quick drive over here.
What they mean: I sat in 2 hours of soul-crushing traffic.

What they say: I’m from San Diego/Orange County.
What they mean: REPUBLICAN

What they say: I’m on a cleanse.
What they mean: I’m so hungry I might eat you.

What they say: I love Elon Musk.
What they mean: I work for Tesla and I’m afraid of getting fired.

What they say: My company just IPO’d.
What they mean: I’m very rich now.

What they say: The tech industry has really improved SF.
What they mean: My company just IPO’d and I’m very rich now.

What they say: San Diego is the best.
What they mean: Surfing is life.

What they say: I want to move to Portland.
What they mean: My facial hair isn’t quite working down here.