What they say: I’m going to the doctor.
What they mean: I’m going to the weed doctor.

What they say: I’m from L.A.
What they mean: I’m from San Fernando Valley.

What they say: I can’t eat gluten.
What they mean: I choose not to eat gluten.

What they say: I’m allergic to dairy.
What they mean: Almond milk semms cool right now, let’s go with that.

What they say:I’m a DJ.
What they mean: I’m an asshole.

What they say:I’m from San Diego/Orange County.
What they mean: REPUBLICAN

What they say: I’m going to the store.
What they mean: I’m going to the weed store.

What they say: I love that bar you mentioned.
What they mean: Never been, totally insecure about that.

What they say: It was a quick drive over here.
What they mean: I sat in 2 hours of soul-crushing traffic.

What they say: I love Elon Musk.
What they mean:I work for Tesla and I’m afraid of getting fired.

What they say: I’m on a cleanse.
What they mean:I’m so hungry I might eat you.

What they say: I live in Joshua Tree.
What they mean: I took acid one too many times.

What they say:My company just IPO’d.
What they mean: I’m very rich now, you should hate me.

What they say: The tech industry has really improved SF.
What they mean: My company just IPO’d, you should hate me.

What they say:San Diego is the best.
What they mean: Surfing is life.

What they say:I want to move to Portland.
What they mean: My facial hair isn’t quite working down here.

What they say: I don’t do cocaine.
What they mean: I love cocaine.

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