Photo: spo0nman

1. Hungarians don’t say “She’s jumping for joy.”

They say “Örül, mint majom a farkának.” (She’s as happy as a monkey about his tail.)

2. Hungarians don’t say “Bullshit!”

They say “Lófasz!” (Horse dick!)

3. Hungarians don’t ask little children “Why are you crying?”

They ask “Miért itatod az egereket?” (Why are you giving drinks to the mice?)

4. Hungarians don’t call you “useless.”

They say “Kevés vagy, mint mackósajtban a brummogás.” (You’re as little as the roaring in a Mackó cheese — this is a type of Hungarian cheese that has a small bear on its label.)

5. Hungarians don’t say “It’s not worth the effort.”

They say “Annyit ér, mint halottnak a csók.” (It’s worth as much as a kiss to a dead person.)

6. Hungarians don’t say “Far, far away.”

They say “Az Isten háta mögött.” (Behind God’s back.)

7. Hungarian guys don’t say to one another “That chick is a 10.”

They say “Az egy bombanő.” (That’s a bomb woman.)

8. A Hungarian won’t say “Once a thief, always a thief.”

He’ll say “Kutyaból nem lesz szalonna.” (You can’t make bacon out of a dog.)

9. Hungarians won’t say he’s “good-hearted.”

They’ll say “Kenyérre lehet kenni.” (You can spread him on bread.)

10. Hungarians don’t call you “gay.”

They call you “meleg” (warm).

11. In Hungarian you don’t say “Cool!”

You say “Tök jó!” (perfectly good!), “Zsir!” (Fat!), or “Király!” (King!)

12. Hungarians don’t yell “Hey, you’re blocking my view!”

They yell “Apád nem volt üveges!” (Your dad wasn’t a glassmaker! As in, you’re not transparent, so get out of the way.)

13. Hungarians don’t say “When pigs fly!”

They say “Majd ha piros hó esik!” (When red snow falls!)

14. Hungarians don’t ask “What the fuck are you doing?”

They ask “Mi a faszomat csinálsz?” (What my dick are you doing?)

15. Hungarians don’t say “It’s not as good as you think.”

They say “Nem kolbászból van a kerítés.” (The fence is not made from sausage.)

16. A Hungarian doesn’t say “You son of a bitch!”

He says “Te geci!” (You jizz!)

17. Hungarians don’t say “It’s all Greek to me.”

They say “Ez nekem kínai.” (It’s Chinese for me.)

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