1. You’ve pledged a strict allegiance to Philly or Pittsburgh sports teams…
The age-old rivalry of east versus west is alive and well. It’s Flyers versus Pens, Phillies versus Pirates, Eagles versus Steelers. You don’t even have to live in Philly or Pittsburgh to participate in the trash talkin’.
2. …and to Wawa or Sheetz.
Out-of-state friends don’t get it, and will even try to tell you that Wawa and Sheetz are “just convenience stores.” But these so-called friends clearly don’t understand the true brilliance of having a mini deli, cafe, and grocery store all under one roof. Whatever. That just means there will be fewer people waiting in line at the Built-or-Made-to-Order Touch Screen.
3. You even have an opinion on the “gob” versus “Whoopie pie” debate.
While we can’t quite seem to settle on the name, we can all agree on two things: 1) they’re delicious and 2) they’re definitely native to PA, not Maine.
4. You’ve crossed state lines just to buy fireworks…
Then driven right back home to set them off. Because celebrating the 4th of July in the state where the Declaration of Independence was signed should be more exciting than some lame sparklers and trick noisemakers.
5. …and envy anyone who can pick up alcohol at the grocery store.
6. You think Thanksgiving is a five-day holiday.
1) Thanksgiving Day, 2) Black Friday, 3) Saturday, 4) Sunday, and 5) opening day of rifle deer season.
7. You were shocked to learn the “cookie table” is NOT a universal wedding practice.
Platters upon platters of delicious homemade cookies for half-drunk and hungry guests — what’s not to love? And, no, cookie tables are absolutely not and should never be considered a substitute for wedding cake. What blasphemy!
8. You owe a lot of your food preferences to the Pennsylvania Dutch…
Real chicken potpie, pork and sauerkraut, scrapple, chow chow, shoofly pie, and, of course, whoopie pies. Don’t try to dispute their true origins with us–we’ll defend them to the end.
9. …and you know PA makes the best sandwiches, no matter which side of the state you’re on.
Nothing says “hangover cure” quite like a Philly cheesesteak or a Primanti-style sandwich.
10. Most importantly, you know all the variations of the second-person plural.
And we’re proud of youse for that. Yinz too.
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