24 things you’ll never hear someone from Wisconsin say

1. Let’s go get something to drink at the water fountain!
2. I think I’d rather go to a Bears game.
3. You know, I don’t really care for fish boils.
4. It’s Friday! I’ll have my fish baked.
5. Man, Summerfest sucks.
6. No thanks, I don’t like beer.
7. I think we should sell our cottage.
8. Those drivers from Illinois really know what they’re doing!
9. Racing sausages? Never heard of it.
10. We call those traffic lights here.
11. German food is the worst!
12. It’s too cold to tailgate.
13. Isn’t a brat just a hotdog?
14. Crap, I forgot to get my hunting/fishing license this year!
15. I don’t think we get a lot of snow here.
16. I’ve never been to Noah’s Ark.
17. I’m thinking about removing the fire pit from the backyard.
18. What’s Mars Cheese Castle?
19. Booyah doesn’t have anything to do with food.
20. Hold the brandy in my Old Fashioned, please!

These cheese curds are just way too squeaky.

21. Can I chase my Bloody Mary with water?
22. The state fair has terrible food.
23. All the Sporkies sound disgusting.
24. If you haven’t had a cream puff, you’re not missing out.