1. You’ve been to the Jack Daniel’s Distillery to cure a hangover.
2. You know that being served the “fruit of the Spirit” by the hippies at the Yellow Deli means devouring a Deli Rose sandwich.
3. You feel Bonnaroo is comparable to Woodstock.
4. You also feel it’s ridiculous that people consider Bonnaroo comparable to Woodstock.
5. Sundrop is your drink of choice.
6. When downtown in Nashville, you create false identities for yourself because you know you’ll never see anyone you meet ever again.
7. You don’t really like the color orange despite your Vols-obsessed family.
8. You were actually embarrassed when Tennessee voted yes on Amendment 1.
9. But then you celebrated when the state also voted to start selling wine in grocery stores.
10. You’ve gotten drunk before going to Rock City’s Enchanted Garden of Lights at Christmas time and almost didn’t make it through the Fat Man’s Squeeze.
11. You love bluegrass but can’t stand country.
12. You know someone who works on the set of Nashville.
13. You’ll never admit it, but you think Dollywood is better than Six Flags.
14. You bought a dulcimer to get in touch with your Appalachian roots but never learned how to play it.
15. There’s not enough booze in the world to convince you to spend any amount of time on Honky Tonk Highway.
16. You’ve bruised your legs jumping from the rocks at the site of the 1996 Olympic whitewater canoe and kayak competition.
17. You were heartbroken when you found out you would never again experience vertigo at Shenanigans.
18. But you were ecstatic when they reopened it a year later.
19. You still tell people your state has the world’s longest pedestrian bridge even though you know Poughkeepsie, New York took over that title in 2009.
20. You’ve ruined your clothes with grass stains while box sledding down the giant hill in Renaissance Park.
21. You don’t get paid enough to buy a cup of coffee from the coffee shop you work at in Nashville.
22. You were pissed when you found out George Clooney stayed in Chattanooga for a few days and no one recognized him.
23. You think being anywhere close to Gig City is the ultimate bragging right for a millennial.
24. You’re convinced that your subdivision isn’t on the same level of suburbia as everyone else’s.
25. You know people who have only traveled to eight other states — and they all border Tennessee.
26. You’ve felt like you were at Hogwarts while visiting friends at the University of the South.
27. You’ve gotten a calzone from Lupi’s while still wet from the North Chick swimming hole.
28. You’ve been tempted to drive on one of the runaway truck ramps while driving over Monteagle.
29. Memphis seems like a mythical place that you’ll venture over to someday. Maybe.
30. You saw Loretta Lynn and Jack White perform together in Nashville — and it was literally the most Tennessean thing you’ve ever experienced.
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