1. How the Packers are playing.
Every year is the Packers’ year! Until it’s not and everyone’s heartbreak is only made worse by the fact that it is probably below freezing outside and spring is not to be seen for several more months. Maybe complaining about how Rodgers and the rest of the Pack are playing is how we protect ourselves from probable heartache.
2. How the refs are not doing their jobs.
Although we complain about how our beloved Packers are doing, we also love to whine about how it’s not their fault. It doesn’t matter that refs are trained professionals, we believe that we obviously know more about football than they do.
3. People from Chicago
We love visiting Chicago and generally get along with our neighbors to the south. That said, we also take great pleasure in complaining about how annoying Chicagoans can be, clogging up the state’s best sites with their SUV traffic, inexpertly running over ski tips at ski resorts, and being obnoxious at Wisconsin sporting events.
4. People who don’t know how to drive in the snow.
We have had a lot more practice driving in extreme weather conditions than your average joe, but some people are simply hopelessly clueless.
5. Cold weather in the spring
Haven’t we earned a little sun yet?
Excessive snow + ridiculous ice + harsh salt to minimize risks of aforementioned elements = torn up streets. Dodging large pot holes in the spring before crews can get out to repair them (if they ever do) is a way of life in Wisconsin — as is whimpering about them.
7. Freeways and too much traffic
We love to complain about having too many freeways with excessive lanes — they cut through historic neighborhoods, break up communities, and distract from our beautiful nature. However, we, Wisconsinites also love to complain if we get stuck in traffic for longer than 5 minutes. This isn’t Chicago, ya know!
8. Mass going over kickoff on a Packers Sunday.
Watch those Wisconsinites who spend part of their Sundays in a house of worship go from Midwestern friendly to full-on passive aggressive if the service starts inching closer to kick-off time. We need to get home in time to get those brats on the grill!
9. Minnesota getting the nickname the “Land of 10,000 Lakes”.
Look it up — Wisconsin has more lakes.
10. Fish fry running out of fish
We look forward to our Friday ritual of enjoying a lightly breaded perch with tartar sauce, so if the place we love best has run out of fish, you’re going to hear us talk about it.