Photo: Angelo GiampiccoloShutterstock

Watch a Pilot Deliver the Most Concerning Joke Announcement About Landing at LaGuardia Airport

New York News Airports + Flying
by Olivia Harden Apr 2, 2022

Although plane crashes are rare, flight attendants and crew want you to be prepared in an emergency. That’s why in the seat in front of you’ll find the outlined safety instructions, and the flight attendants either show a video or do a physical presentation about all of the safety procedures before each flight. That reassurance that there’s a plan if something goes wrong can help passengers who may be anxious fliers feel a bit more comfortable. But sometimes, the crew and attendants may find laughter the best medicine. In the case of TikToker Pria Alpern, she found her pilot’s sense of humor to be far from hilarious.

@drpriaphd Thanks for the panic attack @United Airlines #anxiety #mentalhealth #united #unitedairlines #laguardia #nyc ♬ original sound – Dr. Pria, PhD

La Guardia airport in New York is notorious among pilots and frequent fliers for its short runways. The airport, built in 1939, has runways constructed for the small prop planes of the time, measuring a little over 7,000 feet. In comparison, Los Angeles International runways range from almost 9,000 feet to more than 12,000 feet. The runways aren’t necessarily unsafe, but they certainly aren’t the safest. On Alpern’s United Airlines flight, her pilot asked how many people had flown into LaGuardia Airport before, only to try to warn passengers about a bumpy ride into the airport with some humor.

“Buckle up. This is not going to be the greaser landing your mommy told you about — or dad… Those of you with dentures, those will probably be up here in the bulkhead. Just kidding! It’s going to be safe. … The alternative is a really smooth landing, and we wind up in the river which is probably not preferable for anyone right? … If Jay’s landing is great you’ll see me up here after the flight taking credit for it, because it’s good to be king. If it stinks, I’mma put him up here to say goodbye to you guys.”

To be honest, it doesn’t seem like the kind of reassurance passengers are looking for — you only overhear one quick chuckle. Maybe save the jokes for after you’ve safely landed.

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