Tony Hayward announced his resignation as BP’s CEO on July 27, 2010; the resignation takes effect in October. Before he says farewell, though, Matador’s Mike Collins has a few words for Mr. Hayward.
Hi Tony,

Can I call you Tony? I feel like we have gotten so close lately. I just wanted to drop you a note to congratulate you on your yacht doing so well in the J.P. Morgan Asset Management Round the Island Race. As a former sailor and a former asset owner, I know how exciting it can be.

I am sorry for not writing sooner. I know there is no excuse and I feel silly trying, but since the fishing industry over here on the Gulf has taken a turn for the worse, I cannot afford Internet at home. And with the gas prices the way they are I needed to consolidate my errands. While I can’t really go inside Starbucks for WiFi because it’s for paying customers only, standing close to the window like this seems to get an ok signal.

It is great to see you getting your life back. I’m getting into some new hobbies myself. I am finding that Bird Washing is a fun and educational pastime. Long walks on the beach are nice. And since we have to wear gloves and boots there is less chance of sunburn.

I have to apologize for all the crap you have been getting from my fellow countrymen lately. Like you said, “The Gulf of Mexico is a very big ocean. The amount of volume of oil and dispersant we are putting into it is tiny in relation to the total water volume.” And compared to the amount water the fish actually need…. I have a fish tank at home and they don’t really need that much.

I know it must be boring looking at pictures about the “you know what”, but I thought it might be fun to see what the oil boo boo looked like if it happened by the big race your boat is in:

Image by Mike Collins

Well, I just wanted to touch base and wish you well. We are all praying for you to get your life back.

Sincerely,
Your Biggest Fan

[Editor’s Note: This was originally published on Mike Collins’ blog, Exotic Visitors. It has been reprinted here with Mike’s permission.]
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