Photo: Linda Armstrong/Shutterstock

12 Signs Your Parents Tried to Kill You on Your Vacation to the Mountains of Colorado

by Tim Wenger Oct 31, 2016

1. You sat staring out the car window on the way in, already in terror, as the car pulled off of I-70 and began to creep over a mountain pass with dramatically beautiful cliff drops just feet away. Why are we going UP?

2. They conned you into taking the fast lane down the alpine slide at Breckenridge, while your brother got to take the slow track (but it felt good to beat him down the hill!)

3. They gave you no choice about riding that mountain bike down the hill, even though you tried to stay on the lift and ride back down the safe way.

4. They made you hike on that trail through the forest, showing blatant disregard for the dangerous wildlife. They knew the whole time there could be a bear right around the next turn.

5. Laughing, they tugged you securely back into the raft at the last possible second after a patch of whitewater nearly toppled the whole thing over.

6. You were forced to leave your friends back home and hang out with strangers in an unfamiliar town.

7. And were forced to eat at rustic local restaurants instead of the chains and normal places back home.

8. They left you with that ski instructor that kept talking about pizzas and French fries but never gave you any.

9. They forced you to leave the bunny hill and go up the main lift all the way to the top of that giant mountain.

10. No one showed you how to stop on the tubing hill, but they sure didn’t mind giving you a push to get going.

11. Your dad forced you to do all the work on the pedal boat, carrying him clear across to the other side of the lake.

12. Then, after you could barely move your legs, he made you walk through all of the friendly people downtown to get ice cream.

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