1. “Por favor señor, llevese a este niño porque ya no lo soporto” (Please, mister, take this kid with you because I can’t stand him anymore).
Yes. You were actually offered up for adoption anytime you misbehaved in public.
2. “Te vuelves a dejar y cuando llegues a casa, yo te voy a pegar mas fuerte” (If you let someone bother you again, as soon as you get home I will hit you harder).
Some moms offer bullied kids hugs and a shoulder to cry on. Your mom schooled you on how it was going to be.
3. “Mi casa no es hotel” (My house is not a hotel).
If you went out on Friday and Saturday, on Sunday morning you were guaranteed to hear this one.
4. “El muerto y el arrimado a los 3 dias apestan” (A guest house like a corpse smells on the third day”)
This image stuck in your head taught you to never overstay your welcome.
5. “Sana, sana, colita de rana, si no sana hoy, sanara mañana.” (Heal, heal, froggy tail, if you don’t heal today, tomorrow will be the day).
It didn’t matter if it made sense or not. She enchanted you enough with this phrase that any injury instantly felt better with these words.
6. “Pues limpia tu cuarto” (Go clean your room).
A Mexican mom’s go-to response to you saying you are bored. Because apparently cleaning is a great source of entertainment.
7. “Ahorita no, ya va a empezar mi telenovela” (Not now, my soap opera is beginning).
It seemed like any time you needed help with Algebra homework, mom was plopped down in front of the TV.
8. “Ven aca, te voy a dar algo para que llores de a de veras” (Come here, I’m gonna give you something to cry about for real.)
You could never get away with crying just to get your way. Stone cold, she was.
9. “Da gracias que tienes que comer cuando hay tantos niños en el mundo con hambre” (Be thankful to have a plate of food when other children in the world are starving)
There is no tolerance for complaining about the food in a Mexican household.
10. “Llevate el sueter” (Take a sweater with you).
No matter if it’s 100 degrees out, mom has a sweater in her bag just in case there’s a freak snowstorm. One can never be too careful when it comes to staying warm.
11. “Tu puedes papi, te van a amar” (You can do it, daddy, they will love you).
Mom always had your back and would be your biggest cheerleader in your new ventures.
12. “Untate vapor rub y acuestate” (Put on some Vick’s Vapor rub and go to your bed).
It didn’t ever seem to matter if you had a cold, pneumonia, or a hangnail. Somehow Vick’s was going to fix everything.
13. “Ya casate y dame nietos, o que ¿voy a ser la unica de mis amigas que no tiene nietos?” (Get married and give me grandchildren already! Am I going to be the only one of my friends with no grandkids?)
It really didn’t matter if you made it clear you didn’t want kids. That was not even an option in her head.
14. “Siguete haciendo el chistosito y vas a ver cuando lleguemos a la casa” (Keep playing funny and you’ll see when we get home).
And you knew the threats were not idle.
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