1. No one can hang out this weekend because they are all “Up North” with their families.
No need to specify an actual destination. Up North can mean anything that’s not too close to Detroit.
2. Being late because you were de-icing your car is not a legitimate excuse.
You knew you had to de-ice it. You always have to de-ice it. So why didn’t you do it earlier?
3. People look at you in confusion if you say “soda” instead of “pop.”
And every Michigander knows that Faygo and Vernor’s are the best kind of pop.
4. You can head out to Canada for lunch and be back in time for dinner.
Windsor is only a short drive away. Head across that bridge and you’ll be there in no time.
5. Everyone knows how to correctly pronounce Mackinac, Ypsilanti, Lahser, Sault Ste. Marie, and Charlevoix.
6. Summer is Construction Season and winter is Pothole Season.
There are no other seasons.
7. You, and everyone else around you, can explain exactly where they live by pointing it out on their hands.
You know exactly what someone is talking about when they do it, and you do it too.
8. You know that Hell is real.
And you’ve been there. And it’s not that bad!
9. You can’t be a princess for Halloween because the outfit definitely won’t fit over your snowmobile suit.
Want to wear that pink frilly thing? Too bad. It’s October, it’s freezing, and you’re going wear your winter coat.
10. You’ve recently encountered a Yooper.
And boy, do you love their accent.
11. Blue and Green are not colors.
They are states of mind. If it’s game day, you know which color you’re wearing -and it sure is not red.
12. There is mass outrage when some other city tries to call itself “Hockeytown.”
So Chicago keeps winning Stanley Cups? Who cares! Detroit is, and always will be, Hockeytown.
13.Your little sister is going on a field trip to the Henry Ford Museum.
And probably also Greenfield Village.
14. You’re free to post on Facebook that you’re headed to AA, and you’ll get no judgment.
Everyone knows that AA does not just stand for Alcoholic’s Anonymous. AA is only the best city around. Unless of course you’re one of those people who went to school in East Lansing.