1. She’s warned you to cover your mouth if you have to go outside right after eating. You don’t want a boca chueca!
2. For some reason, the more time you spend with her, the more weight you put on.
3. Her words are very powerful among your family. If your new SO wins the abuela’s heart, the rest of the family are a piece of cake.
4. She knows how to use a molcajete to prepare something other than guacamole.
5. She remembers the birthdays of her entire army of nietos without checking Facebook.
6. She owns a soap opera and she refers to it as “mi novela” or “mi comedia”.
7. She has given you secret gifts. Probably money because she doesn’t understand your likes, and that’s totally fine with you!
8. She calls you by the name of some other family member and you don’t care. After all, you’ve also lost count of how many primos you have.
9. She always has to do her “quehacer” or “el mandado”.
10. She has two or three Spanish sayings that she manages to fit in every situation. My abuela’s favorite is: “Piensa mal y acertarás”.
11. Each time that she drinks in public (beer/tequila or whatever alcohol), someone gets shocked and takes a picture of her.
12. She knows how to do limpias with an egg.
13. She goes to church at least once a week (or once a day!).
14. She has recommended you drink soda as a remedy for a minor health problem…most likely Coke or Sidral Mundet.
15. Her life story compared to yours makes you respect her white hairs even more. When she was in her twenties, she was already managing a home with who knows how many chamacos in the middle of an oppressive macho society, and you… Netflix 😙.
16. She wears pantyhose.