Kaitlin Mills offers a glimpse into her time in the City of Light, Paris.

Number of hours spent inside a plane to get to Paris: 20

Number of screaming children inside the plane: 3

Stairs climbed to get to the top of the Arc de Triomphe: 284

Minutes spent recovering from climbing those stairs: 10

Topless woman seen: 12

Strange etchings found in the concrete: 1

Number of pastries eaten per day: 4

Kilos gained: 3

Number of French words known: 1

Fellow Australians found in one tourist spot: 23

Dogs seen in the airport: 4

Number of times I looked the wrong way before crossing the street: 7

Times I almost got run over: 8

Number of proposals seen: 2

Armless statues seen: 1

Servings of cold tomato soup eaten: 0

Parisians annoyed: 12

Number of French flags seen: 51

Phallic symbols climbed: 1

Number of stairs up to my hotel room: 36

Number of times I got a blank look from the hotel reception guy: 15

Hours spent lost in a museum: 3

Number of times I was slammed up against the language barrier: 11

Pyramids seen: 4

Number of statues mistaken for real people: 1

Palaces seen: 2

Times I ate at McDonalds: 7

Times I eat at McDonalds when at home: 0

Tour guides that were helpful: 0

Number of annoying aunties following me around: 1

Naked gold statues seen: 1

People seen going into confessionals: 0

Kilometers from home: 16,962

Snails eaten: 0

Number of buildings mistaken for the Notre Dame: 2

Priests found inside the Notre Dame: 3

Number of times I ate Daffy Duck: 2

Topless women seen dancing with snakes: 1

Clear blue skies seen: 0

Days spent in the city: 13

Days until return trip: 367

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