It’s that time of the season when we all plan out a list of resolutions for the year ahead of us, but in Wisconsin, our beloved culture makes certain goals almost impossible to achieve. From cutting back on our consumption of cheese to buying fewer knickknacks, here are seven New Year’s resolutions Wisconsinites make but rarely keep.
1. Drink less Miller Lite, old fashioneds, homebrews, and anything else alcoholic.
Wisconsin ranks as one the top 10 states that consume the most alcohol, so drinking less in the Dairy State is a tall order (not to be confused with an order of a PBR tall boy). If it’s not beer, it’s brandy, and if it’s not brewed at the local pub, it’s brewed in your neighbor’s shed. Good luck getting away from alcohol.