29 Travel Writer Problems

Humor
by Katka Lapelosová Oct 25, 2013
1. When you’re offered an all-expense-paid press trip and can’t go

Person punches wall
Read: 10 steps to surviving your first press trip

2. When you have to listen to someone brag about their bucket list accomplishments

Hand talk
Read: Your top 20 bucket list trips

3. When you’re inspired on the road but can’t find a pen or something to write on

Person pounding floor with fists
Read: Travel writing tips

4. When the yurt doesn’t have wifi

A little boy sobs
Read: World’s wackiest wifi hotspots

5. When you read a piece of armchair travel writing

Sherlock says, contemptuously, "Do your research"
Read: 6 tips for travel research beyond your guidebook

6. When a publication does you wrong (e.g., no accreditation, misquotes you, forgets to pay you…)

A person delivering a long line probably meant to be supportive
Read: What you stand to lose in travel photo contests

7. When someone has never heard of your blog / brand / published work

Person says
Read: How to develop a personal brand as a writer

8. When you’ve never heard of someone else’s blog / brand / published work

Harry Potter says,
Read: Quick tips for building your brand

9. When a press trip is super picky about what it wants you to write about, and where you’re allowed to go

I ain't gonna be part of your system
Read: Take control from your host — maintaining focus on press trips

10. When you see other travel writers steal weird things at press conferences

Someone stealing a bite of dude's banana
Read: How are writing conferences relevant to travel writers?

11. When you get writer’s block

Fop says "Shit. Shit. Shit. Shit"
Read: Destroy writer’s block

12. When a DMO sends a blanket email inviting only ONE PERSON from your company to attend a press trip

Gulls squawk "MINE"
Read: DMOs and bloggers, let’s talk content strategy, press trips

13. How you feel after spending all night working on a deadline

A pallid Stewie shivers in a blanket
Read: Confession — I am addicted to freelance work

14. After you sign a contract, and figure out you’re being underpaid

I'm going to type every word I know. Rectangle. America. Megaphone...
Read: How to set your freelance pay rate

15. When you show up to a press conference, and you’re under/overdressed

Man says, "Well, this should be great"
Read: How awkward pet photos brought my family closer

16. When an editor totally changes the article you worked on for a week

Host crumples paper wildly
Read: 5 common mistakes editors make

17. Watching other travel writers kiss ass to get a press trip

A person stares disdainfully
Read: The anatomy of a fam trip

18. When you have to pay estimated quarterly taxes because you’re a self-employed freelancer

Man sobbing in the shower
Read: Tips, tricks, and tax deductions for freelancers

19. Trying to figure out how much you’ll make if you’re writing a 1,422-word article that pays $0.08 cents a word with an 8.75% commissionable rate


Read: 10 paying travel publications you might not know

20. Looking for jobs on Elance

Squidward hates everyone
Read: Freelance wars: oDesk vs. Elance

21. When you’re on the road so long, home becomes unrecognizable

George Bluth Sr. hides in attic
Read: Notes on trying to date at home but live nomadically

22. When you can’t find your glasses, your car keys, your social security card, your wedding ring, etc. but you know exactly where your passport is

Beyoncé wonders, "What am I gonna do with your passport, baby?"
Read: How to travel on a third-world passport

23. When your job is to travel the world, and you have a severe fear of flying

Patrick Star on plane wing
Read: How to piss off someone with a fear of flying

24. When you’ve traveled so much, you can’t even date anymore

Couple and third wheel
Read: You’ve traveled so much you can’t even date anymore

25. When your blogger-in-residence facility has a dial-up modem

Slow internet connection causes Gollum to writhe
Read: 8 North American residencies ideal for travel writing

26. When you’re on assignment and you suddenly get food poisoning

Bridesmaid not sure which end that came out of
Read: How to travel in India and not get sick

27. When you hear someone complaining on an all-expenses-paid press trip

Person says shut the fuck up
Read: The lowdown on press trips

28. When people don’t take your job as a travel writer seriously

Person says,
Read: How to become a travel writer (seriously)

29. When you’re working from home and realize that, eventually, you will have to put on pants

Muppet drops head into hand
Read: 20+ awesome travel jobs and how to get them

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