1. You like paying taxes.
Although “taxes” is an obvious anagram of Texas, there are no state taxes here! Giving your hard-earned money away is so rewarding, but you just won’t get that chance here!
2. BBQ and steaks are way too good.
BBQ-addiction is a very serious health hazard. And there is no way to escape it in Texas. I’ve tried it once, and now I will crave it for life! And don’t even think about becoming a vegan… it will be impossible to stay away from those delicious steaks for a very long time!
3. Gas is ridiculously cheap!
So, I don’t pay taxes… they could at least let me pay the highest price for gas. But, no! Gas is so cheap here compared to other states that I feel embarrassed and don’t even dare mentioning it to people from California or NYC.
4. Who likes sunshine all year long?
Texas has the bluest sky I’ve ever seen. Boring, right? Sun is so overrated anyway. People in Dallas have to cope with sunshine most days, and it makes it almost impossible for them to show off their brand new umbrella. Damn. It’s tough.
5. People are too friendly and helpful.
People you don’t know will smile at you and make you feel welcome anywhere you go. Creepy, right?
6. The variety of landscapes can be overwhelming.
Texas is way too big and there are too many different landscapes and places to explore: big cities, beaches, canyons, hills, lakes, prairies of bluebonnets… If you’re not a good decision maker, it will be hard to choose.
7. Everything is so big!
So, the state itself is big, obviously. But so is all the rest! When they say that everything is bigger in Texas, they’re not kidding. Big portions on your plate, big events, big shopping malls, big houses, big pools, and so on… What if you like things small?
8. Too much music!
If you hate music festivals, just stay away from Texas. With awesome events like Austin City Limits, Summerfest, Edgefest, and Austin being the Live Music Capital of the World, you won’t stand it!
9. Tex-Mex food is addictive.
On top of being a BBQ-and-steak-addict, now I also have to start controlling my Tex-Mex food cravings. There are plenty of delicious Mexican restaurants in the Lone Star state, and resisting temptations of fresh guacamole and sizzling fajitas is a tough task, believe me!
10. Too many shopping options will drive you crazy!
With some of the biggest malls of the country, like the Houston Galleria, Texas offers people too many opportunities to spend their money and become compulsive shoppers.
11. There’s a risk of being drunk too often.
Margaritas, and especially frozen margaritas are so good here that it might actually become a problem… You’re already a compulsive shopper and a meat-addict, you wouldn’t want to become an alcoholic, right?