1. You’re the conversationalist at the party.
That good ol’ Texas hospitality doesn’t go to waste. Whether you’re courting strangers’ attention or just talking it up with friends, Texans know how to be the life of the party. We may be the crazy one jumping off the roof into the pool, but we’re just as likely to wow you with our words.
2. You’re also the one who drinks the most.
I met a fellow Texan staying in a hostel in Boracay. When I saw him, he had a deep cut on his hand that looked like it needed serious medical attention. How did he get it? Not a clue. Just another drunken night as a Texan. We may not represent the best drinkers on the planet, but we certainly hold our own among other nationalities. We might do better at looking out for sharp objects.
3. You’ve definitely done something stupider or more dangerous.
So, you’ve never stripped down, jumped into a mud pit, and walked home with a deadpan expression as everyone stared? Clearly you’ve never pledged at a University in Texas. It should hardly come as a surprise that when you get a lot of big people consuming a lot of alcohol, shenanigans are bound to happen. After all, in Norway the word Texas is used to describe something crazy.
4. Like it or not, your palate isn’t that refined by most standards.
I love Texas. It’s my home state. But to say that growing up there gives you an appreciation for good alcohol is misleading at best. Lone Star Beer, brewed in Texas since 1884, isn’t winning any “best beer in America” awards anytime soon. Nor are we particularly well known for our wine – yes, there actually is some wine. Fellow Texans are probably more likely to have an affinity for tequila over scotch or vodka, and we’ve seen our share of well drinks.
5. You’re probably more afraid of the police showing up.
Whatever your opinion of the police, you probably had your share of experience dealing with them as a partygoer in Texas, even when you could legally drink. I’ve been threatened with arrest while simply drinking and camping with a group of friends in west Texas. The police don’t exactly have the best track record when it comes to just letting kids enjoy themselves on the weekend, and you may still be holding onto some subconscious fears of being busted.
6. You expect good music.
Even if you didn’t go to UT, you probably have high standards when it comes to getting the appropriate background music for your drinking games. It doesn’t have to be live and definitely doesn’t have to be the Dixie Chicks.
7. You know about the greatest purple margarita.
Baby Acapulco, in addition to having some excellent pre- and post-drinking Tex Mex food, has one of the craziest challenges for Austin drunks. Their purple margarita is so insanely strong – loaded with Everclear – that each location cuts people off after two. There are five locations. You guessed it… some people try to get all ten in one night.
8. Your gambling skills probably improve.
Texas hold ‘em is a game of strategy and knowing your competition… or, after one shot too many, you might just go all in and win by dumb luck.
9. Drinking feels the most natural when you’re sweating buckets.
Why do Texans drink, ultimately? Because beer is foamy and delicious? Well, that’s part of it, but none of us deny that our state turns into a barren hells cape between June and August and we would take anything to alleviate the heat for even a minute. What good is cracking an ice cold Shiner if you can’t grip it with sweaty hands and find some relief from the 100+ temperatures.
10. You probably embrace the stereotype after a few drinks.
In public or even amongst friends, you might go out of your way to convince everyone you’re not a typical Texan with a strong drawl jumping on horses every day and rounding up cattle. After a few shots, sometimes it feels natural to play to the crowd, throw on an accent, and see if you can wrestle a steer.
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