So, you’ve moved to New Mexico. The Land of Enchantment, home of green chile, beautiful sunsets, and endless questions about Breaking Bad. Yes, it’ll probably take a while to get used to living here, as there’s no place quite like New Mexico, but pretty soon you’ll get into the swing of things, especially when you notice that you’ve started to do these 33 things that mean that you’re becoming a true, bonafide New Mexican.
1. You have a distinct chile preference and are completely loyal to it.
2. You know what “Christmas” means.
3. Spring is now your least-favorite season.
4. You freak out about 2 inches of snow, either because it’s too much or too little.
5. You never use your turn signal anymore.
6. You’ve forgotten how a 4-way stop works.
7. You never go outside during summer without shoes because of the goatheads.
8. Your interior decor now includes chile ristras, Navajo rugs, cacti plants, and at least one Kokopelli sculpture.
9. You can make a killer Margarita.
10. You’ve been to Zozobra.
11. Your Christmas decorating now includes farolitos.
12. Snow in May totally doesn’t surprise you.
13. If the weather is bad, you wait because you know it’ll be over in like 5 minutes.
14. If you didn’t ski before, you do now.
15. You’ve been abducted by aliens.
16. You have a favorite breakfast burrito spot.
17. The sound of coyotes howling at night doesn’t freak you out anymore.
18. You will never like Colorado green chile.
19. You’ve had to buy a second fridge for all your roasted chile.
20. Every other picture on your Instagram feed is now either a sunset or a picture of the last meal you had out.
21. You can’t imagine ever eating a burger or pizza again without green chile as a topping.
22. You’re used to your nights out ending at 1 AM and having to head home to drink more.
23. You would do anything to avoid the summer crowds at the art markets in Santa Fe.
24. You’ve become spoiled by how easy rush hour traffic is.
25. Your new favorite fast food joint is Blake’s.
26. You’ve gotten a Zia symbol tattoo.
27. You’ve been asked about Breaking Bad by out-of-towners.
28. You now call it the Land of Entrapment.
29. You’ve resigned yourself to endless road work.
30. You’ve had to explain to someone that you do not, in fact, live in Mexico.
31. You’ve also had to explain that New Mexican food is different from Tex-Mex.
32. You’re always running late and don’t care.
33. You never want to leave or move anywhere else.