In Great Britain, you don’t shot put, you wang Wellies. Or at least that’s what this infographic, put together by HolidayCottages.co.uk, suggests. Below is a list of some downright bizarre (eating stinging nettles?) traditions and games and where you can find them on the island. After a quick look over, we think you will agree: it is time for us to organize the Great British Olympics!

1. Waen Rhydd Peat Bog, Llanwrtyd Wells, Powys

Swimming in a bog… competitively?

2. Five Oaks, West Sussex

Racing lawn mowers has pretty broad appeal.

3. Ramsbottom, Greater Manchester

In which competitors knock stacks of pastries off a ledge with blood sausage.

4. St Ives, Cornwall

Having an entire town of teenage boys fight over a chunk of silver sounds like the surest way to break everything.

5. Inveraray, Argyll and Bute

It’s sort of like tossing a massive javelin, but you get to wear a kilt.

6. Upperthong, West Yorkshire

Damn right it’s time to consider chucking rain boots haphazardly across a field a sport.

7. Olympia, London

It’s like normal horse racing, except everything is tiny and adorable!

8. Swaton, Lincolnshire

Gently tossing an egg to your friend sounds like a wonderful way to spend a weekend afternoon. I’m in!

9. Tetbury, Gloucestershire

Because running between pubs with a sack of wool used to be a sure way to impress a lady.

10. Peterlee, County Durham

Using a hardboiled egg to break someone else’s hardboiled egg is such an endearing competitive sport that I almost cried watching the 2013 finals.

11. Marshwood, Dorset

It’s like the Coney Island hot dog contest except competitors are just straight-up eating stinging nettles. So, you know, totally insane.

12. Fenny Bentley, Derbyshire

Just taking footsie to a whole new absurd, borderline Salvador Dali surrealist level.

You absolutely rock, Great Britain.

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