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What we say: “This isn’t spicy at all!”
What we mean: “A lifetime of some serious chili habit has effectively numbed every pain receptor in my mouth.”

What we say: “Let’s meet at my place at six for dinner.”
What we mean: “If you happen to arrive at six prepare to see me half-dressed, in the middle of a nervous crisis, without anything ready and the house an impossible mess. You could arrive near seven to help me with the preparations and receive the early guests, or you could also arrive around eight thirty when everything is set and ready…consider what suits you best.”

What we say: “Taco.”
What we mean: “A soft corn tortilla that can actually be rolled and stuffed with whatever type of food we want. Not that hard shell thing some of you guys are used to. What is that supposed to be? We don’t even have a word for that thing in Mexico.”

What we say: “Ya merito.”
What we mean: “It shouldn’t take that long — just give me a couple minutes, an hour tops. Let’s say tomorrow just to be sure…Ok, probably it’ll never happen, but keep in mind I had the best of intentions.”

What we say: “I’m dying to see you, but I’ve been busy as hell and flat broke.”
What we mean: “Would you buy me lunch one of these days?”

What we say: “I’m so very sorry, but unfortunately I’m not gonna make it tonight! I’m so ashamed for the late notice, but a lot’s come up. My car broke down this morning, and my day’s been a nightmare since. If that weren’t enough, tomorrow I need to get up before sunrise for my meditation course, and also…”
What we mean: “I’m not coming.”

What we say: “Can I bring a couple of friends?“
What we mean: “I’m at one hell of a party right now. Mind if we join forces and show this city what a real celebration’s like?”

What we say: “I have a craving for some extra hot chilaquiles.”
What we mean: “I had the craziest weekend ever. I don’t even understand how I’m still standing! I feel like my head’s gonna explode, and I could probably use a new liver. Someone help me…please?”

What we say: “I’m stuck in traffic, but I’m on my way.”
What we mean: “I’m stuck in bed, but I’m on my way — as soon as I take a shower, check my Facebook (a quick check will do since I’m in a hurry) and put some decent clothes on. I just hope I won’t get caught in traffic.”

What we say: “Sure! I’ll see you there!”
What we mean: “I have the firm intention of going, but there are so many things that can ruin your plans on a Friday night. I’ll tell you what — if there’s nothing on TV, and no better plan turns up, I’ll be seriously considering going.”

What we say: “Can I call you back in five minutes?”
What we mean: “Five minutes is long enough for me to completely forget you ever called me. Better call me again.”

What we say: “We’re getting thirsty, aren’t we?”
What we mean: “Fuck this! Who’s buying the first six pack?”

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