What It's Like When You Visit Denmark for the First Time

Denmark Humor
by Katrine Damgaard & Jan Matheu Aug 26, 2013
When Danish people talk about the weather

You know what sucks? Everything

When you ask a Dane if they speak English


When foreigners say “tak”

Delighted clapping

(Pro tip: Tak means “thank you.”)

When you visit the western coast of Denmark

Orphan holds toy and says: It's beautiful!

When you discover licorice

The lord is testing me

(Pro tip: Licorice (lakrids) is a popular type of candy in Denmark — it is salty and sweet at the same time.)

When you use public transportation

I...like it!

(Pro tip: Everything is usually empty, on time, and convenient…though riding bus line 5A (Northern Europe’s busiest) can feel like this…)

There's too many people on this earth. We need a new plague.

When you try “Smørrebrød” for the first time

(Pro tip: Smoerrebroed is a typically Danish lunch dish, an open sandwich on rye bread served with different kinds of topping. And when you try to pronounce it…)

That's impossible!

When you talk to Danish people about Denmark

How's bragging camp going?

When you visit Christiania

Is everyone here VERY stoned?

(Pro tip: Christiania is a small city inside Copenhagen, where people live a ‘bohemian’ life. Pot is really easy to buy here, but isn’t legal!)

When you see people riding Segways

You are literally too stupid to insult

When you get to Tivoli Gardens

A princess grins

(Pro tip: This amusement park in is the second oldest in the world, after Bakken, also in Denmark.)

When you discover all the different Danish ways to prepare pork

Food can't hurt me. Food can't leave me. Food won't cheat on me. It's like, my everything.

When you taste “sild” for the first time

Jack Sparrow makes disgusted face

(Pro tip: This is a Northern European way of preparing herring.)

When foreigners speak to Danish people on the street

You don't know me!

(Pro tip: Danish people usually only talk to people they know.)

When foreigners hear Danish for the first time

I understand NOTHING

When Danish people defend their drinking habits

I could be a drug addict, do you realize how lucky you are?

When you see the Little Mermaid

Lucille eyeballs something disapprovingly

(Pro tip: This is a statue in Copenhagen.)

When you get to Lego Land

Sunglasses man removes sunglasses to get a better view

(Pro tip: Legos were invented in Denmark, and there’s a theme park based on the toy.)

When you shop in Denmark

Customer removes bill from wallet, as though to pay, but instead exchanges entire wallet and keeps bill.

When you see all of the delicious cakes at “Lagkagehuset”

Conan hops up and down

(Pro tip: Lagkagehuset is a famous bakery chain.)

When you experience Danish fashion

Why are you dressed like somebody died?

When you hear about the Danish welfare system for the first time

Are you kidding me?

(Pro tip: You’ll have the same reaction when you discover they pay up to 60% in taxes.)

When you realize beer is cheaper than milk

Straight to the bar!

When you see the queen’s castle surrounded by the Royal Guardsmen for the first time

Is this real life?

When you go to Gothersgade at 3am on Friday night

I'm surrounded by idiots

(Pro tip: Gothersgade is one of the main party streets in the middle of Copenhagen, and at this hour will be full of young and extremely drunk people.)

When it’s over 15ºC (60ºF) in Denmark

Man runs away from a small wave on the beach

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