1. Where’s a good place to burn a couch?

2. How many dudes you know roll like this? How many dudes you know flow like this?

3. Where’s the paua in my fritter?

4. Bach or crib?

5. Speights or Lion Red?

6. It’s okay to bowl underarm, right?

7. Did you get that from the Warewhare?

8. Which flag is New Zealand’s again?

9. Why all the squashed possums?

10. Would you like some gumboot tea?

11. How come OMC was a one-hit wonder?

12. Why is the internet so slow?

13. What exactly do you mean by yeah-nah?

14. When you say ‘choice,’ are you saying I need to make a decision?

15. Does anyone still watch Shortland Street?

16. You don’t really care what Australia thinks, right?

17. Why is it OK to wear pajamas in public?

18. Or go barefoot everywhere?

19. Why does nobody ever carry an umbrella, even when it’s pissing down?

20. Why do I feel like I’m just going around in circles in Whakatane?

21. What’s the deal with all the bagpipes?

22. Does anyone living on Baldwin Street ever get to work on time on a cold winter morning in Dunedin?

23. Why would the Black Cocks not be a great name for the national badminton team?

24. How on earth did Wayne Shelford keep playing?

25. Why is 90 Mile Beach not 90 miles long?

26. How are ‘Superman’ and ‘Number 16 Bus Shelter’ acceptable names for a child, but ‘4Real’ and ‘Talula Does The Hula From Hawaii’ not?

27. Whose idea was it to make a flightless bird the symbol of the Royal New Zealand Air Force?

28. Whatever happened to True Bliss?

29. Britomart must be some kind of British supermarket, right?