36 Things You’ll Never Hear Someone From New Mexico Say

Here are 36 thing’s you’ll never hear anyone from New Mexico mutter.

1. “La Llorona is just a myth.” Shut up, she’ll hear you!

2. “I prefer Colorado green chile.”

3. “I just heard that *insert name of popular musical act here* is coming to do a concert, we should get tickets!”

4. “Stepping on goatheads doesn’t hurt that much.”

5. “What is Zozobra?”

6. “No chile for me, thanks.”

7. “I’m not in the mood for a Blake’s breakfast burrito.”

8. “I don’t like spicy food.”

9. “What does ‘orale’ mean?” What doesn’t it mean?

10. “Remember actually doing something productive with our time when we were teens instead of spending our entire summer vacations hanging out around downtown Santa Fe and the Rail Yard?”

11. “I’ve never had a 4 Loko nor was it one of my first initiations into the woes of being hungover.”

12. “My house doesn’t have vigas.”

13. “Who is Smokey the Bear?”

14. “I have never seen a coyote just walking down the main street in the middle of town, minding its own business. Or seen bears in town. Or cougars.”

15. “I never learned about the Pueblo Revolt extensively and at length in school.”

16. “Flash floods are totally no big deal.”

17. “They’re finally opening an In n’ Out!”

18. “What is PizzaGate?” The ORIGINAL PizzaGate! The real PizzaGate!

19. “I know what a turn signal is and use it.”

20. “Oh yeah, I avidly follow the Lobos.”

21. “I think Dreamstyle Arena is a better name for The Pit.”

22. “I also think Santa Fe Place is a better name for the Villa Linda Mall.”

23. “Let’s go to Las Vegas!”

24. “I always fly out of the Santa Fe airport.”

25. “I pay for entry to the Balloon Fiesta.” Why would you pay, you can see them from anywhere in the city! Shmuck.

26. “I have never made fun of Truth or Consequences. Or Española.”

27. “No, there aren’t THAT many casinos here.”

28. “Our sunsets aren’t that great. They’re pretty, but they’re not, like, knockouts.”

29. “I never got up way too early to go to the Bosque del Apache to see the cranes.”

30. “I don’t believe in aliens.”

31. “I’ve never gone skiing.”

32. “Who the heck is Georgia O’Keeffe?”

33. “I’ve gone to Chimayo and brought back some of the sand, even if I’m not religious.”

34. “What is White Sands?”

35. “I’ve never gone to a 7/11 for a burrito or chimichanga at 3 am.”

36. “New Mexico IS a part of Mexico.”