Barcelona locals have seen it all when it comes to tourist shenanigans: dudes wearing banana hammocks running around town, couples getting cozy on a mattress in the middle of Plaça Reial, and massive tour groups blocking La Rambla during rush hour.

We are proud of our city and love to share it with the world, but there’s a limit to our patience and acceptance. Here are some things tourists do that drive us absolutely crazy:

1. Sleeping all over Barceloneta.

We understand why tourists love the beach strip — it’s got dozens of bars, tapas restaurants, space to jog and rollerblade, and a crazy nightlife scene. While many tourists enjoy Barceloneta within reason, there are always those who decide to pass out drunk on the benches, the beach, and even on the street next to dumpsters.

We want to see visitors enjoy the sunshine and chupitos but having to jump over them and their puddles of vomit in the morning pisses us off.

2. Walking half-naked around town.

Yes, Barcelona is something of a beach town but that doesn’t mean that you should convert their bikini into a full-time outfit.

Since the trend of walking around grocery stores shirtless and pantless caught on, the city passed a law making partial nudity illegal. Throwing on a shirt before leaving the beach is a good idea unless you’d rather pay a $150 fine.

3. Riding segways.

Segways make locals’ blood boil.

Tourists ride them all over — by the port, on the beach, in the parks — and make pedestrian traffic a hassle. Ditch that ridiculous machine and use your two feet — I’m sure you can use the exercise.

4. Taking anything they’ve ever heard about Spanish culture and applying it to Barcelona.

No, Barcelona is not synonymous with sangria, paella, and bullfighting. We are very proud of our local cava (sparkling wine), escalivada, and we care about animals.

Don’t come uninformed and engage in discussions you don’t really understand.

5. Trashing the Gothic Quarter.

Sadly, many visitors engage in alcohol tourism. Yes, the booze in Spain is way cheaper than in London or Paris, but that doesn’t mean that you should get hammered and trash the streets.

While the Gothic Quarter is one of the most popular spots to visit, it’s also a residential area and locals should not have to clean your mess.

6. Screaming after quiet hours — we will pour water on you.

Being loud after quiet hours (around 10-11pm), is a major no-no and violating this rule has consequences.

You know why locals always keep a carton of eggs handy? Because we throw them at people who are being too loud! Throwing water down from balconies is another popular punishment for loud visitors. If tourists are lucky, they’ll get the eggs first, then the water, but the best alternative is to just keep it quiet.

7. Walking slowly in large groups in key city areas.

While we understand that you want to see La Rambla, Park Güell, and Passeig de Gràcia, please don’t slow us down as we are heading to work.

8. Trying to discover all of our speakeasies and post them on the internet.

Yes, we know — tourists want to experience the city as locals and discover all of its secrets. We will let them in our speakeasies and show them off-the-beaten-path spots, but posting everything online ruins the experience for everybody.

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