1. We pronounce New Jersey like “New Joisey”.
Please stop with this already. Also, we don’t all say “foggetaboutit.” Only someone doing a bad impersonation of a Jersey accent says this.
2. Livin’ on a Prayer is our state anthem.
Maybe if you’re there for last call at Green Rock in Hoboken, or some other obnoxious bar. Only then do people somehow find a need to start belting out this timeworn Jovi tune.
3. Everyone from here is loud, obnoxious, and rude.
Sure, any out-of-stater who drives on the Turnpike might come to this conclusion. And yeah, there are plenty of folks who epitomize this. Take Chris Christie, for instance. But there are also lots of people in New Jersey who also can’t stand this in-your-face kind of attitude.
4. Everyone lives off a parkway exit.
There is a lot more to the state than Garden State Parkway exits. People seem to think New Jersey is just one damn highway. There are plenty of cool places quite far from the “beloved” parkway. Take Lambertville. Nice quaint town by the Delaware River with cute antique shops and a laid back vibe. It’s also nowhere near the parkway, so you’d sound kind of lame if you asked a resident there about a parkway exit.
5. Everyone at Seaside Heights partakes in asinine antics like on that joke of a show “Jersey Shore”.
First off, most of the assholes on “Jersey Shore” are actually from New York. Second, yes, of course, we do have our share of meathead partygoers in Belmar who probably need to lay off the hair gel and tanning salon. Stereotypes come from somewhere, after all. But don’t associate Snookie as the poster child of New Jersey. Bet she couldn’t even tell you where Lambertville is.
6. New Jersey is filled with bad drivers.
Well, this one isn’t entirely false. Especially when jughandles are involved. Quick-tempered drivers is probably more accurate. Just wait a few extra seconds once the light turns green and you’re guaranteed to be met with a barrage of honking horns.
7. We don’t know how to pump our own gas.
Damn straight we do. Lots of people take trips to New York and Pennsylvania. Only the truly lazy ones wait to get back here to have the gas pumped.
8. The entire state smells like a garbage dump.
This has to be something only people who’ve flown into Newark and took the Turnpike straight to New York City assume. Yes, that strip of highway through the marshland of Secaucus indeed smells like a sewer. Maybe try taking a trip to one of the many towns in New Jersey and you will find lots of trees and nature.
9. New Jersey is just a big mess of highways and urban sprawl.
Not true at all. The Pine Barrens make up about 22% of New Jersey, so no, our state is not merely a strip of highways. It isn’t called The Garden State because people think the name is pretty. We love hiking and nature. There is even a section of the Appalachian Trail called “Stairway to Heaven” that features forest, wildflower fields, a suspension bridge, a cow pasture, bouldering, and a killer view of the Kittatinny Mountains at the top.
10. Everyone is from the mob.
Thanks to The Sopranos, now all the world thinks that anyone from New Jersey has some connection to the mafia. Great.
11. We love our pizza and bagels.
Well, okay. This one is true. We have the best pizza and bagels. Take Star Tavern, a New Jersey pizza joint that even rivals New York with some of the best thin crust pies.
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