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14 Signs You Were Raised by Finnish Parents

Finland
by Veera Papinoja Feb 11, 2016

1.You started your life living in a box.

You know that you’d never have a baby in any other country, as it’s not easy to get started without äitiyspakkaus.

2. Nukkumatti came in at night and threw sand in your face to make you fall asleep.

Six o’clock every night on TV, this little strange man in a blue hat made you feel very sleepy.

3. You were told that not drinking milk with every meal will lead to a very painful death.

Valio’s finest is the only source of calcium. It’s simply vital. En oo juonu maitoo enkä juo is the most dangerous sentence in Finnish language.

4. When you didn’t behave as a kid, it was time for tukkapölly or luunappi.

Tough love is the only way to raise a kid. And you know it.

5. And if you didn’t behave the whole year, Santa Claus brought you only sticks on Christmas Eve.

Christmas presents are the best thing of the year. So you would suck it up and behave your best eventually.

6. You opened a savings account the day you were born — so you could buy a house later.

Your parents made sure that you’ll have enough money for the day you moved out.

7. You know not to talk to strangers.

Strangers are only there to harm you. Don’t get to know them.

8. You have gotten several Iittala products for your birthdays.

From Mariskooli to Aaltomalja, you simply have it all. Whether you like it or not.

9. You’ve spent all of your childhood summers at the family cottage.

Your family owned a little wooden house in the middle of nowhere, and there was simply no other place to spend your summers at.

10. Saturdays were the highlight of your life.

Paa pa pa paa pa paa paa pa paa pa, maa ma ma maama maa maa ma maa ma — I mean, there’s nothing like Moomins on Saturday mornings, with a little Lauantaipussi in the afternoon (KARKKIPÄIVÄ).

11. Weekly sauna is a must.

As your parents taught you, the rest of the world’s people are simply dirty for not having a weekly sauna.

12. Whenever you ate too much sugar, a little evil troll would eat your teeth.

Hammaspeikko was the villain of many nightmares. The guy still freaks me out today.

13. You were raised to have sisu.

Walking to school in -30 degrees through snowy forests is fine, suck it up!

14. You are shy but find it completely normal to be naked around strangers.

The weekly sauna thought us to hang around other people naked without it being sexual in any way. So you are simply fine with it — friends, family or strangers.

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