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7 Abilities Kansans Have Over Everyone Else

Kansas
by Joseph Griffin Jan 17, 2017

Being able to say, “Get the hell out of Dodge” and mean it literally.

Assuming you’re in the legendary Wild West town of Dodge City, KS, you can look someone in the eye and mean what you say when you tell them to get the hell out of Dodge.  Or you can realize you’ve been in Dodge City for too long and it’s time to get the hell out of Dodge yourself.  Either way, this phrase means more in Kansas than anywhere else in the world.

Planning a road trip.

When a Kansan decides it’s time to get the hell out of Dodge (literally or figuratively), a lot of times that involves planning a road trip somewhere.  For instance, you could take the advice from Dodge City’s website and “get the heck into Dodge” where you could buy a “get the hell outta Dodge” shot glass or t-shirt from the Boot Hill Museum.  Or you could drive out to Colorado for a stay in the Rockies, go to the Ozarks in Missouri, or drive down to Austin for South by Southwest.  One person I know goes to Florida every year, and a friend of mine is planning on driving to Glacier National Park soon.  Kansans can plan for a road trip like no one else.

Making anything out of wheat.

Kansas is “The Wheat State.”  One of the major crops grown in Kansas is wheat, and, on average, Kansas ranks number one in wheat exports.  Our farmers can grow some wheat, that’s for sure.  But farmers aren’t the only ones who have anything to do with wheat in Kansas.  People in Kansas have found all types of things you can do with wheat.  For instance, there’s a life-sized replica of the Liberty Bell made of wheat in Goessel, Kansas.  There’s some great beer, such as Free State Brewery’s Wheat State Golden.  There’s WuShock, Wichita State University’s mascot, which WSU describes as “a big, bad, muscle-bound bundle of wheat.”  If we can make a mascot out of wheat, we can make anything out of it.

Knowing the real meaning of “There’s no place like home.”

This means, “There’s no place like Kansas.”  However else you might interpret the movie is wrong.

Being able to recognize a Jayhawk.

A Kansan can spot a Jayhawk anywhere.  It’s almost like a sixth sense.  The first thing you pick out from a crowd.  I can remember going to Paris with French Club in high school.  Amidst the throngs of tourists mobbing the Eiffel Tower was this random couple wearing KU t-shirts featuring our iconic mascot.  It’s hard to say what we noticed first, the Eiffel Tower or the Jayhawk.

Having basketball bragging rights

Kansas might not have a professional basketball team, but Kansas certainly has some bragging rights when it comes to the topic of basketball.  The University of Kansas’s basketball program was founded by James Naismith, who invented the sport.  Oh, and Wilt Chamberlain went to KU in the ’50’s.

Being able to dress for all seasons at once

Or, maybe I should say some Kansans are good at this, but not all.  Some just wear shorts all year round.  One way or the other, the weather changes all the time and you either learn how to dress for it and bring an extra hoodie, jacket, or coat and maybe dress in layers, or you decide it’s too much trouble to deal with and just wear the same thing no matter what.

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