30 Signs That You Are Raising Venezuelan Kids
They have more uncles, aunts, cousins and godparents than other kids. Even before their birth…
You never forget to include empanadas when preparing their snacks for school.
More than once you caught them red-handed (or, literally, with “their hands in the dough”, con las manos en la masa).
They seem to have natural skills for playing hopscotch with wet paper.
You look for Pocholin and Kickers shoes (or similar ones) because you are certain those will resist the whole school year.
Technology isn’t all: you teach them that traditional games, such as marbles and kites, are still exciting.
You always cheer for them during a “caimanera” game.
Thanks to you, they love arepas. Particularly with cheese.
Most likely, one day a dog appeared in your front door and it suddenly became your kid’s first puppy… without your permission.
Their favorite fruit is mango and you’ve caught them climbing mango trees! Although it scared you, deep inside it made you feel proud of them as well.
They love playing with water balloons during carnival, and all your neighbors turn into perfect targets for them. Even when you tell them “that’s not right”, you can’t help but to enjoy it!
You feel kind of fulfilled when your kids become immune to “chalequeo” or bullying. You have learnt well, my young padawan!
They master the art of acting as a lookout… whenever they are doing naughty things with their siblings or cousins behind your back.
Root beer (the “maltín polar”) is their favorite drink. That’s what they ask for in the supermarket!
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Maybe there was a time when your kid had a chick as a pet, and suddenly it went missing. You still remember the bati-bati ice cream you bought to make the tears go away.
Their outfits are mostly based on “ovejitas” T-shirts.
Venezuelan kids love platanos with cheese… especially when the platano is soft and sweet. Yummy!
You still don’t get it: Why is your kid afraid of the garbage truck, even when you never tried to frighten him or her with it?
If, at a birthday party, you haven’t said, “Those who don’t sit don’t won’t get a piece of cake”… you are not raising a Venezuelan kid.
Small wooden sticks or matchsticks are perfect toys for your children to play speed racing in the mud after the rain.
When you go for a walk, they always want a homemade ice cream -best known as “chupis” or “bambinos”-.
You taught them it is “chicle” and not “bubble gum”.
A Venezuelan kid perfectly knows that Mondays are for black beans! (caraotas, really)
And he or she believes in Baby Jesus instead of Santa Claus.
Every Christmas you explain to them fireworks are dangerous… and they always find those “triquitraquis” (or similar) and manage to scare the s* out of you!
No matter how organized you seem to be… you always end up running and ironing your kid’s costumes 2 minutes before leaving the house.
And what about making the costumes? The fancy dress you created for your daughter, or that hero costume tailored for your son… are better than Ralph Lauren’s designs, aren’t they?
Whenever you see your kid volunteer to sit down and do the homework… You immediately know that, at least, there are broken glasses to be repaired.
You possess the secret to calm down even the fiercest warrior: the “arroz con leche” song!
Among their firsts words, you taught them three important ones: “yellow, blue and red” Venezuela’s flag colors of course!