What Celebrities Need Is a Free Tropical Vacation

The catch, of course, was that celebrities had to show up at GBK’s Celebrity Gift Lounge. A burdensome task, surely. Nominated actors not in attendance received a measly three- to five-night stay at one of the participating resorts. I guess they’ll just have to use their own private jets to get there.

We all deserve vacations, even celebrities. And the stress of the Golden Globes is enough to send anyone running for tropical destinations, especially to cope with the aftermath of being in the public eye. With viewers whispering their distaste over Cameron Diaz’s manly muscles, and gasps of horror emanating from every living room in North America as Jessica Biel told Madonna that she was treading on her designer gown, it was only a matter of hours before such important news pieces made headlines. Never mind Seth Rogan’s erection.

Maybe if I book my ticket immediately, I can lounge beside Jennifer Love Hewitt at the pool or swap spit with Ben Schwartz. I can provide valuable life advice for the young Booboo Stewart, or become chums with Anthony Anderson. Seriously, how did anyone from Scream 4 get nominated?

Yes, my round-trip plane ticket (first class!) from LA to Fiji will only cost me 3,650.92 USD, along with 9,387.57 USD for a week’s stay at Tadrai Fiji Island Resort. That’s literally almost two-thirds of my annual salary. Back in 2008, Jennifer Love Hewitt made 166 times the income I did. Given the fact that over 20 celebrities were on the guest list, we’re looking at over 200,000 USD in gifts in total.

Me, bitter? Never!

No worries, though. GBK did generously donate $10,000 to The Foundation for the Education of Needy Children in Fiji.