1. You call pasta “noodles.”
Italy actually has a law stating that dry pasta is only authentic if it’s made from durum wheat flour, preferably semolina (although in recent years, this restriction has become less enforced). The stringy, unleavened wheat-based product sometimes made with eggs is a lot heavier than traditional pasta, and is more common in German or Asian cuisine. Calling it maccheroni is a bit more acceptable, but keep in mind that, like spaghetti, these are merely types of pasta; ordering based on its actual name, like pappardelle, gemelli, or orecchiette, makes you sound like a badass.