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12 Dilemmas Only People From New Hampshire Understand

New Hampshire
by Chelsea Stuart Aug 15, 2015

1. Determining whether an event has a flannel-friendly dress code.

Flannel is the unofficial state uniform of New Hampshire. Male or female, I’d be surprised to find a closet without at least one shirt of the plaid variety.

2. To visit Winnipesaukee, Ossipee, or Winnisquam.

There’s no question as to why celebrities have summer homes in New Hampshire’s Lakes Region. We commoners have a tough time deciding which one to vacation on as well.

3. Whether to get hot or iced coffee in the dead of winter.

Dunkin Donuts iced coffee is a part of everyday life in NH. Their commercials don’t lie; we literally run on Dunkins. Whether or not to grab a coffee isn’t a question we ever ask ourselves, it’s just whether or not to get it hot or iced, and no inclement weather will deter us from our iced coffee drinking ways.

4. How to explain the magnitude of the Old Man Of the Mountain to post-fall generations

The Old Man Of the Mountain — the profile of a face created by cliffs jutting out of Cannon Mountain — was New Hampshire’s pride and joy up until he fell in 2003. People were so shaken after his collapse that grievers left flowers at the base of the mountain in condolence, and state legislators considered changing NH’s flag to include the historic figure. How does one convey such significance to those who have never even seen his majestic figure?

5. What beach to say you’re going to — even though we all know you’re likely going to Hampton.

Everyone in NH loves to hate on Hampton Beach, the most frequented but also trashiest of Granite State beaches. Sometimes, when we’re feeling adventurous, we mosey out to Maine or Cape Cod, but most often we’re plopping our butts down on the eclectically-littered sands of Hampton. So next time you attempt to lie and say you’re headed to York or Ogunquit, just know we all see right through you because we do the same thing.

6. How to explain Fluff to those who have never heard of it (yes, those people sadly exist).

To say that Fluff is spreadable marshmallow simply doesn’t do it justice. Words can’t explain its brilliance, it’s a you-have-to-try-it sort of thing.

7. How to explain to foreigners where you’re from.

Whenever we travel we’re faced with the dilemma of whether to tell people we’re from New Hampshire, or just to say “I live an hour outside of Boston.” Beantown has some major name recognition, but none of us can help but feel a tinge of guilt every time we fail to mention NH for the sake of brevity.

8. Thinking Adam Sandler movies are shit but that Adam Sandler is cool.

For most of us, it all started to go downhill somewhere around Big Daddy. Even though we don’t understand how his movies are still making money, the dude is pretty cool and we are happy for his continued success and that he is one of our own.

9. No S’more or Microwave S’more.

We take our S’mores seriously in New Hampshire and they’re a favorite snack for campers around the state. Sometimes, in a pinch, we’ve also been known to make them over a gas stovetop or in the microwave. Though these are totally bastardized ways of going about it and we feel bad about tainting the exquisite treat, fire or no fire — when you need a S’more, you need a S’more.

10. How to dress at the start of spring.

We have some long, freezing cold winters in New Hampshire. For this reason, most people jump at the chance to slip into their spring wardrobes when the new season finally comes around. Even though those first few weeks are likely to vary greatly in temperature, witnesses can attest to the fact that shorts and T-shirts will be out the second we hit over 50 degrees.

11. How to deal with running into people from high school.

NH is a tiny state so anytime you’re home, you’re bound to run into people from your past. Sometimes this is an awesome perk, other times…not so much.

12. Where to put all that snow.

We’re known for getting mass amounts of snow — up to 10 feet in northern parts of the state — every winter. For this reason, shoveling becomes an art form. Novel and intricate snow formations are created each year in our attempts to keep snow out of our own driveways without throwing it into our neighbors’ or the street.

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