What It Feels Like to Visit Slovakia for the First Time

Slovakia Humor
by Denisa Neštáková Jan 3, 2014
When you first arrive and suddenly people are kissing you on the cheek

Animated person getting kissed on cheek

When you get to the capital, Bratislava, and proudly explain how you know everything about Slovakia because you’ve seen Hostel

Go away

When you discover the Euro is Slovak currency

Happy face

And then when you learn what the average Slovak income is

Baby looking frightened

When you tell a Slovak you’re a vegetarian

Big eyes, blank expression

When the locals then force you to try the Slovak national meal, Bryndzové halušky

Cartoon figures chomping food
Bryndzové halušky are potato dumplings stuffed with bryndza sheep cheese and bacon.

When you discover beer is cheaper than water

Devious smile

But then you order a Czech beer by mistake

What did you say?

When you’re told absinthe is legal in Slovakia

Guzzling drinks

When you get your first absinthe hangover

Wacky-eyed glasses


When you see the Blue Church for the first time

I love you!
The Church of St. Elizabeth, commonly known as the Blue Church, is an iconic example of Art Nouveau.

When you finally see the Slovak mountains

Ecstatic clapping

When you learn Slovakia has the most castles per capita.

This is the best

The reaction you get when you say ahoj for the first time

I'm proud of you
“Ahoj” is Slovak for “hello.”

And then the reaction when you swear in Slovak for the first time


When you find yourself in the middle of a discussion about Hungarian-Slovak relations

SHUT UP! Shut up! Oh, my god! I don't care!

When you accidentally mix up Slovakia and Slovenia

I won't hear it and I won't respond to it

When you suggest that the Slovak national hockey team might not be the best in the world

Face slap

When you redeem yourself by mentioning how awesome Peter Sagan is

You're goddamn right
Peter Sagan is a Slovak professional road bicycle racer.

When you remember you’re in the country with one of the most beautiful girls on Earth


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