open closet door. survey.
breathe. move everyday items out of way to get to camping items. slow, deliberate. closet is small and there are many everyday items in way.
grab sleeping bags, pads, tent. grab cloth-and-rod sleeves that fit around pads to fold them into chairs. grab mesh bag with pocket stove, fuel, aluminum mug, two sporks red and yellow, dr. bronners soap, plastic wire scrubber. breathe. smell mesh bag. spearmint soap and faint char. grab pack towels, bug spray, headlamps. look around closet. think, “car camping.” grab maroon bag w/ big maroon folding chair.
close closet door. breathe.
take items to living room and dump on living room chair. watch them settle into their own pile. step back. breathe once. leave room.
go to bedroom. take twenty minutes to think about clothes. what clothes to take? fleece. rain jacket. all else personal preference.
pack clothes in black duffel. grab two big pillows and put on top of bag.
go back to living room and see camping items resting in pile on / around chair. see them like first time. see granny smith of sleeping pad, navy of sleeping bag. feel like dog who knows he’s about to go for walk.
take navy sleeping bag and stuff sack, sit on other living room chair. work bag into sack, rotating sack, palming bag against inside lining of sack. pull drawstring tight and cinch plastic cord lock. breathe. repeat for second bag.
take granny smith pad, valve open, by short end. fling it out. take end and roll onto itself. roll again, then listen to air hiss out. roll roll roll hissssssssssss. roll roll roll hissssssssssss. close valve. repeat for second pad.
take items outside to driveway by trunk of car. make three trips. slow. drop items by car. watch items settle into their own pile.
open trunk with key. survey. trunk is clean. transfer items from driveway to trunk. organize. food bag right, stove bag next, tent pads bags, camp chair left, big pillows on top.
close trunk and remove key. breathe.
go back to porch and look at car. breathe three times, looking.
go inside. wait till 5am.