Photo: Nicoleta Ionescu/Shutterstock

10 Fears Only Washingtonians Will Understand

by Marissa Pedersen Jan 5, 2016

1. The friend who hates coffee

It’s one thing if you have a friend who only drinks Starbucks. You can’t even begin to relate to one that doesn’t like going to Caffe Ladro.

2. Having important plans on football Sunday

You know there’s only two places you should be during football season on Sundays, and that’s either at the Seahawks game or watching it live at a Seahawks bar like the Hawks Nest. You consider not being friends with people who make plans at anywhere else.

3. The “Big One”

Earthquakes are far and few between, and we’re still not used to them. Every little tremor we feel makes us think it’s the one we’re due for. Even the Monorail passing by still strikes fear in us at times.

4. Too many people moving here

We know how lucky we are to live in such a beautiful state. It fears us to think others will discover sacred places like Alki Beach and Golden Gardens and overpopulate our area.

5. Bars that don’t have local craft beer on tap

The tap handles are the first area you scan, as it’s the main reason you’re going out. If all you see is Bud Light and Keystone instead of Mac and Jack’s or Pike Brewing Company, you’re walking out.

6. A climate without rain

It may rain more in Seattle than other places. But you know all that means is more amazing snow conditions all winter to ski to your heart’s delight at Crystal Mountain.

7. Someone trying to start a fight

We don’t do well with confrontation. Our lack of response usually infuriates the person starting the argument. If you think we cut in line at Belltown Pub, we’d rather just go to the back of the line than debate it.

8. Not getting a basketball team back

It’s been too long since our Sonics left. We attend the rallies at Key Arena year after year in hopes that this will be the year we get a team back.

9. More huge companies moving here

We’re proud that Seattle is known for Microsoft and Amazon, but they have taken over the area with all the new housing needed. We love our space from our neighbors, and want it to stay that way.

 We’d like to enjoy peaceful brunches at Portage Bay, slowly sipping our coffee and reading our papers without loud, out of towners around.

10. Flying out of any other airport besides Sea-Tac

We have one of the nicest airports around and love flying out of it. It scares you to think you might have to go to an airport that doesn’t have multiple seafood restaurants like Ivar’s and Anthony’s, and a Butter nail salon.

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