1. You began the new year with the Penguin Plunge in Del Mar
You didn’t want to do it. Who wants to jump in the freezing ocean at an ungodly hour on the first day of the new year? You know that water comes from Alaska, right? But for some reason, your dad, even through his hangover, was able to drag you out of bed every January 1st and drive you down to Powerhouse Park, where you and thousands of other people would sprint towards the water, only to stop and scream as soon as the first waves touched the tips of your toes. Then that one guy who always dressed as King Neptune would just waltz right in like it was nothing, and you’d get that rush of testosterone, enough to make yourself jump right in, and the rush of testosterone would be instantly nullified by your balls retreating so far inside you they bounced off your small intestine. You’d crawl out of the water gasping for air, trying to restore feeling to your fingers, while your dad tried desperately to hide the fact that he, too, was shivering.