1. You no longer get screwed on the price of a rickshaw.
And won’t get in one until you can bargain it down for the right price. Two hundred rupees to go ten minutes through Chennai? Um no, 30 will do.
2. You can cross the road in Delhi without any hesitation.
From Delhi to Trivandrum to tiny mountain villages, there are rickshaws, cars, buses and trucks coming at you from every direction. But that’s okay now, you can strut your way to the other side of the road for a cup of chai, no problem.
3. You’ve had the shits at least once or twice, but you’re still chowing down on every type of food.
Who cares if the last time you had a veggie biryani you found rotten chicken bones in it? I mean, anything that tastes that good is worth the risk of running to the toilet, ammirite?
4. In fact, you love Indian food so much now, you know it’s going to be curry for breakfast every morning when you get back home.
You’ll have the idly, masala dhosa, korma and vegetable curry with your coffee and mango juice every morning from now on. Cheers.
5. You’ve reached a completely new level of stoned.
Either from a bang lhasi or sharing a joint with the owner of your favourite bar, you’ve spent at least one night so high you couldn’t move.
6. You don’t think twice about cutting up 13 lanes of traffic in your rental car.
Learning to drive in India is no easy challenge, but you’ve been here long enough to feel like a kid ripping up a go-kart track.
7. Trains: there’s nothing you don’t know.
Whether you’ve braved the sleeper or realised the blessing that is the female-only carriage, you’ve learnt your lessons on how to navigate the great Indian railways.
8. You know what an Indian head waggle means.
It took awhile to come to grips with, but you now understand that the Indian head waggle is a sign of approval — a reluctant “Yes” and a “Yes, okay” but never a no.
9. You’ve been templed-out in Hampi.
And you know it’s okay to take some time away from visiting them for a little while.
10. You’re so used to not getting what you want, you don’t even ask anymore.
Whether you want vegetable fried rice in a restaurant, a tea with no sugar or even a decent night’s sleep — it’s unlikely you’ll get it. You will, however, get something you didn’t expect that’s probably even better than what you thought you wanted. Unless what you didn’t expect was salt in your coffee — but that’s okay too, after all, this is India!
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