1. Burners don’t go to an “art festival” in the middle of the desert…they go home to the playa.
2. Burners don’t just show up or attend…they participate.
3. Burners don’t enter the festival…they (finally, finally) get to the Gate.
4. Burners don’t grab a last meal before arriving…they eat Indian tacos while waiting in line.
5. If it’s your first time, it’s never referred to as your “first time”…Instead, you’re a virgin.
6. Burners don’t leave trash around…they collect moop (misplaced objects) and carry it out with them.
7. Burners don’t go to the edge of the world…they go to The Fence.
8. Burners don’t know Valley Girls…they know Playa Princesses.
9. Burners don’t live in houses…they live in camps.
10. Burners don’t have an address…their camp is located at an hour on the grid and a themed street.
11. Burners don’t exchange small talk…they give gifts and hugs to strangers.
12. Burners don’t catch taxis…they hop on Art Cars for a lift.
13. For a Burner, “art” doesn’t go in a museum…Art is what gets torched.
14. Burners don’t run through sprinklers…they run behind the water truck.
15. Burners don’t eat well-balanced meals…they consume free whiskey and bacon.
16. Burners don’t have rich, obnoxious neighbors…they have Turnkey camps.
17. The Burner’s sacred place is not staid or full of noisy decorum…the Temple is silent and full of graffiti.
18. Burners don’t ride in Critical Mass on Friday evening…they ride in Critical Tits.
19. Burners don’t leave the playa when the festival is over…they return to Default.
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